Dear Employer,
Studies have shown that when elementary school teachers evaluate students with identical grades in reading, science, social studies, art, music and physical education, they believe the attractive students to have the higher IQs, and better prospects of going to college. We know it's fun to have eye candy around the office, but OUR studies have shown that it is often a woman with her nose glued to the grindstone who holds the business together with perseverance, silent competence, and an unassuming appearance. You know better than to make a pass at one of your employees - sexual harassment is an actionable offense, but we wonder if you practice beauty bias anyway.
If you believe you have received this letter in error, consider the following:
--How do you explain hiring the tall, blonde who doesn't (a) know any programming? (b) know how to type? (c) have job experience? (d) know how to take a legible message?
--If you are having a crisis in the office, is your latest hire going to be an asset to you or just provide you with a lovely distraction from your sinking ship?
--List ten reasons for hiring that blonde that you would proudly show to your (a) Board of Directors, (b) attorney, (c) buddies, (d) assistant,(e) Equal Employment Opportunity Commission 6) spouse.
--What are your criteria for giving out bonuses?
Has it occurred to you that there are potential real-life consequences to your behavior? Don't you watch Ally McBeal? You could lose your job, your career, your spouse, your children, end up with a big cut in salary and have to move to some podunk town where you'll be the one looking for a job! You'll be looking down at that paunch and trying to figure out how to make yourself look ten years younger. As you comb your hair over your bald spot, blondie's look alike will be filling out the W2. You've heard this message a thousand times before. You should know...to not judge a book by its cover, that beauty is as beauty does, and that beauty is only skin deep. Stop practicing beauty bias now!
With all due respect,
GuerrillaGirlsBroadBand (a.k.a. The Equal Appearance Opportunity Commission)
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